Its Hard to Say Goodbye

Its Hard to Say Goodbye How did I get here? To t-minus two days until graduation and what I can only describe as a weird sensation in the pit of my stomachâ€"unidentifiable and abstract until Saturday hits and Im officially done with college forever. I might cry. I might happy dance. Right now, all I can say right now is that I am  exhausted  from finals and ready for a nap. Yesterday was an especially bizarre day. I worked my last ever shift as an Allen Hall front desk clerk (a job Ive held from the past three years), picked up my cap and gown from the Arc, and submitted  my last ever final five minutes before midnight (my last final ever!). That last final was for a web design course, and let me emphasize that I am a terrible web designer, so last night was  rough. My gown and stole. This year, we get orange stoles because its the universitys 150th birthday! Ive been agonizing over how exactly to write these wrap-up posts. How do you wrap-up in a succinct few paragraphs what its like to go to college and come out the other side? I already tried to do it through photographs, but Im still not quite satisfied. Just consider this another attempt. I give you a song: The Shins latest album, Heartworms, could not have come at a better time for me, and this song rings too true as I grapple with entering the real world. The lyrics? And I dont want to show you my feelings I dont want to force you to deal I just want to crash through the ceiling Before it gets too real Also relevant to any of you high school seniors about to entire the world as a full-fledged adult for the first time. Ive also been saying a lot of goodbyes: to bosses, co-workers, friends, and professors. With some people, its definitely a goodbye for now, but with others, were both  exchanging goodbyes keeping in mind that we might not see each other again for years. Those goodbyes are the hardest because theyre the most definitive, and those goodbyes are the ones that signal this is the end of something. Its the end of staying up all night, two  nights in a row. Milkshake runs at midnight.  Wearing pajamas to class. Staring down Microsoft Word when all I want is to go to bed. Going to bed when I should be staring down Microsoft Word. Cringing at the one person in lecture who asks way too many questions. Being the one person in lecture who asks way too many questions. Stress eating massive calzones from D.P. Dough. That freshman year-esque sensation you only get when you walk down the Quad and cant believe youre really here, really doing college. Its the end of being that special kind of young that can only happen once, and Im just feeling so lucky it happened here at Illinois. Maggie Class of 2017 After starting my time at Illinois Undeclared in the Division of General Studies, I’m majoring in English and Economics with a minor in Informatics from the College of Liberal Arts and Sciences. I’m from the relatively small town of Manhattan, Illinois.